Lessons From Search Bombing
Some folks are timely with their posts. They write about Christmas on Christmas. Me, not so much.
It has taken me until spring vacation to write about the shenanigans that occurred on April Fool’s Day, when Ironic Mom (Leanne Shirtliffe) and EduClaytion (Clay Morgan) got together and created a hilarious way for bloggers to have a little fun. They call it “Search Bombing” and it involves using Google to type in little things we bloggers know about each other and then intentionally searching for them in an attempt to have them show up on the intended bloggers’ “Most Frequently Searched Terms” lists. And since most bloggers are obsessed with moderately interested about their statistics, it is a fun little way to add a little personalized zing to each other’s pathetic lives spent chained in front of our computer screens.
If you want to know more about Search Bombing, check out this link here. The video kind of explains it all.
The following are terms that I’m pretty sure by which I was intentionally search bombed:
• Lessons in making out with a teacher
• Teachers lessons to dance get me body
• Pictures of hot teacher in Halloween costume
• Giving a cross for a bat mitzvah
• Calgary Calgarah
• The Conclusion for 2011 – kindle and nook almost in a tie
• Pictures of hot girls in graduation hats in space
• I was bullied by my zombie camp counselors
• Teacher fucks puffy coat in elevator
• Did William Golding have any siblings?
Now, people simply have to understand that the post that gets the most views every day is my piece on head lice. Okay, fine. I have an irrational fear about getting head lice. And even thinking about head lice totally freaks me out. That friggin’ post averages 147 hits a day, thus serving as a constant reminder of my neurosis. So I’m not sure I was actually search bombed, but the following are terms that showed up, and they seemed waaaay too detailed and each only registered only one search – which put them on my uber-suspicious list. These searches might have been intentional or not; either way, they are hilarious.
• My kid has head lice. Do I have to do something?
• I was around someone with lice. I use gel and two different hairsprays everyday. Am I ok?
• How do I know it is head lice or just dandruff?
• Has anyone ever tried to blow torch head lice?
So what is the point of today’s blog? I don’t know except to say thank you to Clay and Leanne and Chase and Carl and Jessica and Wendy and Larry and Kathy and Worst Professor Ever… and everyone else who regularly visits my blog enough to know that I loved overnight camp and that I have a thing about people in puffy coats on elevators, that I like to dress kinda slutty for Halloween and that I have a thing for Lord of the Flies. Thank you for making my first year in the bloggersphere so memorable, for introducing me to your friends, and for letting me sit at the cool kids’ table at lunch.
The “cool kids” table at lunch. I remember that. I started the “anti-cool kids” table. Soon it became tables instead of table. and everyone thought it was the new cool kids tables scene and soon I ruled over a whole quarter of the cafeteria. I soon skyrocketed into fame and glory and ran for president of the senior class. Alas, I lost 540 to 577. Needed to be just a little more cooler. It was still cool though. I was in the ring and the rest were in their seats. Mere spectators.
I have nothing to say because I have no idea what that was all about. But I don’t want you to feel I might ever miss your blog. Can we get back to puffy?
I’m on vay-cay-shuuuuun! It’s spring break. Whooooo hooo! I’m sure there will be more “Puffy”-esque stories in the not so distant future. Am keeping my eyes open for them.
I didn’t know you were into this sort of thing. I am the other half of Leanne’s SearchBombShell duo. I’ll be sure to give you some.
You’ve been SearchBombShelled. Just wanted to give you a little “heads” up.
Oooh! I did not know that you were 1/3 of the operation. I’m sorry! Can’t wait to see what comes up on my “Most Frequently Searched For” terms today! 😉
No no, I’m not. It was all them. I was just an early adopter. But I may have invented the Dirty Bomb. 😉
Well, I think I know who searched for “lessons from teachers and twits on giving head (lice).”
Nice. 😉
You were bullied by zombie camp counselors? I can’t imagine you’d be bullied by anyone, unliving or otherwise.
And you don’t sit at the cool kids’ table: you dance on it.
You da (search) bomb, RASJ.
I just got “milk boob automatic drip.” After your titillating post today, I am suspicious.
And, also, I hope that’s a search bomb because otherwise– gross.
Heh heh heh. 😉
I only wish I’d thought of that even though I don’t fully understand it. Is it just a really complicated way to say “lactating?”
Chase:
You are so right. I don’t ever sit. I flit, I float, I glide. I do show tunes.
I call sitting next to you; you know, once you eat all your young. 😉
I’ll put my windbreaker on the seat to save it for you.
Right on! And I didn’t even have to elbow my way to the cool table this time. I mean, never. I just had to check out the head lice post and vomit a little. I got head lice once on kindergarten and I swore it was because my shampoo smelled like strawberries. I mean who wouldn’t want to live in a strawberry patch, men or lice notwithstanding?
Hysterical search bombs! And thanks for including me with the cool kids. I mean, obviously*.
*not obviously.
Omigosh Jessica! Why on earth would you ever confess to me that you have had head lice. How can I sit at the cool kids’ table if you have lice? I know you had them in kindergarten when you smelled all fruity and delicious, but there is no maximum term limit for me when it comes to those buggers.
Sigh.
Okay, I’ll sit next to you. But that’s because of your amazing writing prowess. And you have to promise to not take it personally if I itch my scalp once in a while. 😉
You make the table cool, Renee. I just might have to send you some Search Bomb Lovin’ later today (after I make a difference in the lives of teens – priorities, I know).
And do you know what the blogging consequence for stealing pictures is? You get to take care of that person’s kids for 24 hours to pay for it. I’ll post Thing 1 and Thing 2 in a box later today.
And, on behalf of Clay and me, thanks for honouring our bloggy love child, SB (not to be confused with SOB).
Leanne
Leanne:
After today’s trip to the Corning Glass Museum with three boys (and by boys I mean bulls in that proverbial china shop), I would gladly trade Thing 1 and Thing 2 for my Monkey.
And stealing your picture was totally worth it. (*Simulating my best annoyed student voice*) At least I gave some credit. That should count for something. Shouldn’t it?
Loving your love child.
“Honoring” it, really.
Please make another. 😉
I SB’d you many times yesterday, dahling. Hope you enjoyed them. And happy blogiversary. Can’t believe you’re a relative newbie to blogging (unlike me, who’s got 5 months on ya).
Thanks for the shoutout, Renée…I love this “cool kids table” too (a totally new experience for me!).
Happy Blogiversary…I had mine last month.
“Has anyone ever tried to blow torch head lice?” I haven’t, but it’s tempting…
Wendy
I received a nasty note from the folks at WordPress.com that we are getting a little cliquey for some people. What do you think they are talking about? 😉
I’ve never had a hard time pretending that the table I sat at was the cool kids table. Delusion is a powerful gift. So proud to see our bloggy love child getting so much run. It really was complete brilliance and probably should garner a pulitzer or something. Maybe a Nobel for how we’ve changed the blogosphere. But a big mention on Lessons from Teachers & Twits is pretty sweet.
Oh yeah, incoming for you btw.
Fryber Clay. You are so sweet. Can’t wait to check out the catch of the day.
Also, I’ve known you long enough so that I feel I can let you in on something. Now, this is a pretty big secret, so you have to promise to keep it on the down-low. The Nobels and the Pulitzers don’t make a move without consulting me first so next time you guys are going to mastermind something genius, you might want to let me in on things.
Otherwise, I’ll tell on you and you’ll be sitting in the classroom with the teacher at lunch. Oh wait. You are the teacher…
Oh, and I enjoyed getting “totally educlayted.” 😉
Hey, thanks for the mention Renee. More search bombs on the way!
It’s been great reading your stuff, Larry! SB away. 😉