Humor
Lessons From A Meat Truck
One year ago I bought truck meat. You heard me. Not one but two cute dudes drove into my driveway offering me steaks, chicken breasts and shellfish. Initially, I was skeptical. But I saw the meat had come from a reputable company, a name I recognized. So I figured, why not?…
My Celebrity Doppelgangers
I recently saw Ironic Mom (aka: Leanne Shirtliffe) was playing around with a fun app that shows you your celebrity doppelgangers, and I decided to try it.
Here are the results:…
What to Do If Your Kid Says "I'm Bored"
It only takes once. If your child says, “I’m bored,” this summer, here’s what you do. First get all excited. Then, in the most madly excited voice you can muster say, “You are! Because I have the best thing for you to do, and I was just waiting for you to say you wanted to do something new!” …
Dirty Movies For Tweens
It’s summer. We’ve had a lot of 11 to 12-year-old boys hanging around the house. When it’s raining, they become basement dwellers playing ping-pong or Legos and K’Nex or Wii. I hear their mutterings. The other night one of Monkey’s friends was over. Let’s call him Steve-o. And Steve-o’s going on about movies he’s recently seen. He announces that he’s just seen Dude, Where’s My Car? …
On Selective Remembering
I love that my son is growing older, growing into the person he will one day become more fully. But there are some things I miss: like our Vulcan mind-meld moments….
And Since We Are Talking About Pencils…
My friend Carl D’Agostino and I often find that we have Vulcan mind-melds. This week while I was tapping away about how much my Monkey loves his Ticonderogas, Carl simultaneously posted a pencil related comic on his blog, “I Know I Made You Smile.” …
In Praise of the Pencil
A few weeks back, Monkey came home in a tizzy. “I’m out of pencils again,” he announced. Nonplussed, I told him there were under three weeks of school left and that I was pretty sure he could make-do with his nubs until June 20. He started at me with contempt. “Are you serious?” he questioned. “I have exams! I need pencils! Ticonderogas. Now!”…
"Saturday Summer Screwball" Contest Starts Today!
To inspire my viewers to have some fun, I am kicking off a contest. Read my blog for details on how to enter. And to see this twit dance. (By the way, all my moves are circa 1985.)…
Friday Quick Question: Should We Pet Dead Squeyls?
The other day I saw a sign that read: “Free Babies Clinic.” Which I thought was weird. It was a warm day, and I imagined folks handing out babies like ice cream cones. What exactly is going on? I wondered. But as I got closer, I saw that the sign was actually advertising a “Free Rabies Clinic,” which made me wonder: Are we giving people rabies these days? And who would want that? Even for free?…
How The Struggle To Survive Spring Break Was A Lot Like The Jews' Exodus From Egypt
This year, Spring Break fell on the same week as Passover – the Jewish holiday which commemorates the story of the Exodus, in which the ancient Israelites were freed from slavery in Egypt. (Think Charlton Heston in The Ten Commandments.) This year there seemed to be so many similarities between Monkey’s heinous April “staycation” in Western, New York and the oft-repeated, seemingly never-ending Passover story that I simply could not ignore it….